So many wants, so little time
by pink jelly 1110
Summary: "You think you're so tough do you? Answer a question then." Narcissa laughed. "No, there isn't any hope for the worthless mudblood population. Yes, you will always be inferior to me. Yes, you should go end your worthless li-" "Why did you kiss me?"
1. Chapter 1

**Lily was on her way to the library. As always she rushed slightly, anticipating all the studying she was going to do. The common room was always crowded and noisy. She loved the peace and quiet she found in the library it was like her sanctuary. She rounded a corner a little too fast and… BAM. She was in the floor and books were everywhere. **

"**Oh, I'm sorry. Let me help you." Lily reached out-**

"**Ugh get off me. You filthy-"**

"**Look Narcissa, I said I'm sorry. There isn't a need for vile language."**

"**There is not a need for your kind here either." With that she marched off with her nose in the air. **

"**What a…a-." Lily mumbled to herself. **

" **I believe bitch word be the right word." James interjected.**

**Lily jumped so hard she dropped her books again. "James! How many times do I have to tell you?" She nearly shrieked. "Stop sneaking up on me!" She bent down again to pick up her books.**

**James chucked "Sorry, I just wanted to see if you wanted to hang out." He also bent down to help her.**

**Lily snatched her books out of his hands. "No I do not want to hang out with you. Why would I want….just go away. I have to study." Lily hated when she got flustered. "The O.W.L.s are this year. I DON'T HAVE TIME TO HANG OUT." Lily stormed off. Why couldn't everyone just leave her alone. James was so pathetic. He chased after her when everyone could see that she was not interested. All those stupid slytherins hated her because she was muggle born. Lily finally made it to the library. She settled in. It would be a long evening; she would enjoy every moment of it.**

*******

**Narcissa made her way to the common room. Fury almost radiated off her body. How dare that filthy thing run into her . Down the corridor she saw a familiar figure leaning against the wall with enough grace that it could only be one person.**

"**My dear Narcissa, you seem to be sneering more than usual today. What happened darling?"**

"**Do not get queer with me Lucius. " She poked his chest as he caught her arm.**

"**Darling." Lucius kissed her fingertips. "What happened?"**

**Narcissa sighed and leaned into him. "That stupid filthy mud blood ran into me. She had me knocked down, sprawled on my back, like a common prostitute."**

**Lucius' eyes gleamed. "I hardly think that would be her motive. Calm down my sweet. Let us make our way into the common room."**

**They entered the common room and sat down next to their friends. "Sissy what's wrong?" asked her sister Bellatrix. She was sitting next to Crabbe, Goyle, and Cassandra, all lounging like royalty. Crabbe and Goyle as always had blank faces. Bella on the other hand looked poised and graceful, with hate in her eyes that could only match the devil's. Cassandra on the other hand looked bored as always, running her fingers through her thick chestnut hair.**

"**That mudblood ran into me. I do not see how they can allow her kind in here."**

"**Dippet is soft. Same as the Headmasters before him. Salazar had the right idea." Bella chimed in, as she flipped her long black hair over her shoulder. She completely understood her sister's fury. If that mudblood had ran into her she would have hexed her through the castle walls. **

"**I agree. Dippit is a blood traitor like the rest of them, but do not worry. They will get theirs." Lucius sounded so sure of himself. "This is our last year Narcissa. Soon we will be able to stop complaining and do something about it. "**

**Cassandra's shrill laugh cut through the moment. "Please, you are so piteous…pitiful… pathetic …" Cassandra smiled and her eyes glinted with trouble. "Aren't words fun." She leaned toward Lucius and batted her eyes innocently. **

"**You are a lunatic. "**

"**That might be so, but my lunacy has nothing to do with that fact that you are pathetic." Cassandra laughed again. "What are you going to do about it…huh? Nothing. You Malfoys are all talk. You know, all bark and no bite." **

"**How dare you compare me to a dog." Lucius stood up and drew his wand. "You are no better than any of them."**

**Cassandra snorted. "How 'bout this… all hiss no bite. Would comparing you to a snake be better. Now that I think about it." Cassandra pondered thoughtfully "It is more fitting. Your family is always scheming, sneaking, slithering around to get your way." Cassandra stepped right in front of him. The room seemed to still and went deadly silent. "What is your next plan, almighty Lucius? Let me guess, world domination complete with a purification of our race?"**

"**You are dead." Lucius only had to whisper the words. They sent chills down Cassandra's spine. Lucius could see a flicker of fear before she got herself under control, her hazel eyes no longer glinting with amusement. Cassandra said nothing and retreated up the stairs to her dormitory. Lucius sat back down. The room was sent into a flurry of motion. No one wanted Lucius to see them listening in on his conversation. "Stupid girl. Her father will be so unhappy when she does not return home."**

**All the while Severus sat in the corner. He wanted so much to be like Lucius. He could only imagine how it was to yield such power. For now he could only hide in the corner and study for his O.W.L.s.**

*******

**The next day after dinner Lily was done with her homework, and decided to work on he brewing. Lily went down to the dungeons to find that it was already occupied. "Hello Severus." He was not so bad as long as there were no other Slytherins around. Severus was never very social, but everyone needed a friend right. She watched him as he kept his head down and stirred his cauldron. He was so pale. His skin contrasted so much against his slick black hair. He also had a paranoid air about him, looking around all the time. Lily guessed he had no choice. She would not exactly be a calm person if she had to be in the presence of Slytherins all the time. **

"**Good evening Lily." Proper as always, he kept his head down. Severus always did a good job of controlling himself when Lily was around. He twitched slightly as he got the familiar feeling of butterflies in his stomach. How he wished those stupid butterflies would burn and die already.**

**They worked in silence as the door opened. Narcissa walked in. "Oh dear. Severus I'm rather disappointed in you. Why do I always seem in to find you in bad company?" Lily immediately cleaned out her cauldron and started to pack her things.**

"**We are not….I'm not… alone. We were working alone…not …together." Severus finished in a small voice. Narcissa's glares alone could burn holes in steel. He did not want her to see the fear in his eyes. Lily left without a word. She did not want to have another confrontation so soon. **

"**God Severus. You are absolute filth. I cannot believe you lust after that thing that pretends to be a witch."**

"**I do not **_**lust**_** after her. She is disgusting." Severus could not hide the growing color in his face.**

"**Do not lie to me. I am very observant. You would not believe how obvious you are. I am not the only person who notices the way you look at her when you **_**think**_** no one is paying attention. It is best to remember that someone always is." Severus bowed his head. There was no point in denying it. That would only anger her and everyone tried to avoid that at all costs. "Look at me when I speak to you." Severus lifted his head. "Soon enough the likes of her and all like her will be dealt with. Now is the time to decide which side you will be on. You have plenty of time to think, but it is wise to start acting like you want to be on the winning side. Personally I have no faith in you, but Lucius seems to think that one day we might need you. Do not be a disappointment." Narcissa left the room so Severus could get his thoughts together. She walked down the corridor to her common room. **

**Lily was pressed against the wall praying Narcissa would not spot her. She had left her book in the room and went back to retrieve it. Even she could not resist the temptation to be nosy. Lily walked into the room like nothing was wrong. Severus looked slightly shocked to see her, but tried to hide it the best he could. "There it is ." She grabbed her book and left. **

**Severus cleared out his cauldron. There was no point in trying to work anymore. He tried so desperately to stop shaking, but failed miserably. He was well aware that the world around him was shifting, but he did not expect having to pick sides so soon. On one hand having so much power was unimaginable. Lucius had talked to him many times already, but on the other hand the cost was high. Did all muggles deserve the fate **_**Lord Voldemort **_**held for them? Could Severus trust that **_**Lord Voldemort **_**was seriously a powerful wizard that could lead them to a better future, or was he a complete lunatic?**

*******

**Lily dropped everything on the floor in her room. She flopped down on her bed and felt so confused. Narcissa was bad news. Her conversation with Severus must mean nothing good. Poor Severus being dragged down with all that evil. Alice entered the room and flopped down beside Lily. **

"**What's wrong. You look a bit off."**

**Lily told Alice about what happened in the dungeons. **

"**That does sound a bit fishy, doesn't it? Those Slytherins should be expelled with talk like that."**

"**Alice that is a bit harsh. We do not even know what she was really talking about."**

"**For being such a smart girl you are very daft sometimes. They hate you, because you are muggle born. Obviously they have some maniacal plan to rid the world of **_**your kind.**_**" **

**Lily hit Alice with a pillow. "I'd love to see them try." They both fell into fits giggles.**

*******

"**I spoke with Severus. I do not know what you see in him, and he was with that filthy mudblood." Narcissa sat down on the loveseat next to her boyfriend. He set down the book he was reading and gave her an amused look.**

"**Was he with her or were they in the same room. You are always very quick to jump to conclusions."**

"**They were both in the potions dungeon, but that is not the point. You see how he looks at her."**

"**Sounds like you are jealous."**

"**Don't you dare Lucius."**

"**Darling." Lucius grabbed her by the waist. "Severus is young and naïve. He will see how muggle lovers and blood traitors are dealt with. Ms. Evans on the other hand is no one. A filthy no one that you should not concern yourself with. Soon enough she will be eliminated." Lucius kissed her. " Now let us go sneak up to my room."**

"**Oh Lucius." She hit him playfully. "What If your roommates are there?"**

"**We will easily get rid of them in any case." Lucius pulled her up the stairs and into his room. No one was there so he locked the door. He turned around and saw her robes were already on the floor. He slipped into the bed where she awaited him**


	2. Chapter 2

_Author's note: So here we are at chapter two. Thank you for not thinking that my story completely sucks and being curious as to what happens next. I read a lot of stories with disclaimers…so I decided to do one. Here goes:_

_Disclaimer: I do not own these characters. If it isn't completely obvious then please stop reading and go bash your head into the wall, in between a door and its frame, or find some other way to torture yourself like a house elf*. Ha ha just kidding_

_*please refrain from hurting yourself. I am not in anyway responsible. Really I'm not. Look, no use in arguing just read!_

_***_

The next morning Lily sat with Remus as she ate breakfast. Remus looked worse for wear, but then again he always looked this bad at least once a month. If she had known any better she would say he was a werewolf. She could just laugh at the thought.

"Are you okay Remus? You look very sick."

"Oh, I'm fine. I just have a bit of a cold. You know how I'm prone to those."

"You should go to the hospital wing and get a Pepper up potion."

"I think I might a little later on. How are you doing?" Remus changed the subject smoothly "You seem a bit more stressed than usual."

"Oh, just the usual, O.W.L.s are coming up and I feel like there is so much I have yet to study. Also, all the while I am fending off James futile attempt to 'hang out', and Narcissa has been acting a tad bit more hateful to me lately." Her eyes swept the room and immediately fell upon Narcissa.

As usual Narcissa was sitting with her precious prince Lucius and the rest of their followers. Lily sneered slightly. '_Yes Lucius was her prince and she was the princess.' Lily thought spitefully. 'An ice cold princess and what a freezing bitch she was.' _Lily couldn't help think Narcissa's exterior perfectly matched her personality. Narcissa had straight blond locks that were so fair you could almost see through them, a body she was not afraid to show off (and used quite often to her advantage), lips that blew deathly kissed and always said the most hurtful remarks, and the coldest ice blue eyes. There was something about those eyes that Lily could not get around.

"My, my, my, what do we have here."

Lily's eyes snapped back to the table. James, Sirius, and Peter sat across from Lily and Remus. James gave Lily his famous smile, a smile that always won hearts. Too bad that smile could never win hers. James ruffled his unruly, messy black hair. Lily could tell James was trying to impress her with the wind swept look. He also batted his dark brown puppy dog eyes that would girls would absolutely die for… of course any girl but Lily.

"Save it James. I do not want to be bothered with you this morning. "

Sirius and Peter laughed. Lily tried not to cringe at Peter's laugh, seeing as it was shrill, forced, and creepy. Sirius' laugh sounded like bells next to Peter's.

"Looks like you've been shot down again, James" Sirius nudged him. "Maybe you should finally give up. I noticed Sarah has an eye on you. Why don't you try your magic on her?" James glared at Sirius, which made Peter quiet down, but Sirius wasn't phased. Lily simply rolled her eyes.

"Well, I'm off to class. Remus I'll save a seat for you."

"Lily wait." James had a hit of begging in his voice. "Why don't I walk you?"

"No thank you." Lily snapped.

James grabbed his bag any way and followed Lily. "But I insi-"

"So do I. I do not need an escort." Lily left the great hall with James trailing at her heals.

Across the room Narcissa watched as Lily left with James pathetically following Lily like a lost mutt. James disgusted Narcissa. Not only did he annoy her strutting around as if he owned the castle, but his choice in girls was horrible. James came from a pureblood family, but apparently had no sense. Like most hormonal teenage wizards James thought with his penis. Narcissa could see some of his appeal. Lily had thick, wavy, fiery red hair, a petite frame that she kept well covered up, full lips that could recite a passage from any given school book and gorgeous emerald green eyes. Narcissa had come to hate her eyes the most. Those eyes were knowledgeable, curious, and…kind. Narcissa grew up in a world where kindness got you nowhere. She and Bella learned quickly that kindness was weak, and being weak brought punishment.

***

After dinner Lily headed towards the dungeons. She was the head of her class for a good reason. She was about two potions ahead of her peers, but had encountered some problems. Lily wanted to make sure she got through all the problems before she had to do it in class. She always made Professor Slughorn proud. Thankfully the room was empty when she entered. Lily set up her cauldron and began to work. She was almost done when someone came in the room. Lily didn't need to look around to see who it was because soon enough…

"Ms. Evans, always ahead of the class I see. I guess a muggle born student does need to work a little harder, how sad." Narcissa's mock sympathy made Lily's blood boil.

"Being muggle born has nothing to do with my school work! I study and practice the same as everyone else. Not everyone wants to get by in life on.." Lily snorted. "…good looks or _charm. _If you could even call it that."

"Are you insinuating that I have no intelligence?" Narcissa's voice was low and threatening.

"I am not insinuating anything. I have no doubt that you are intelligent and skillful. You simply choose to use both those things for harm." Lily made her voice even and steady. She could not let Narcissa know how uneasy she felt. With a wave of her wand the contents of Lily's cauldron disappeared. She went to the cupboard to put ingredients away. Narcissa dropped her things on the nearest table and went to the cupboard. As Lily turned around Narcissa shoved her and the ingredients rattled.

"Listen closely you disgusting mudblood. You better watch your mouth before something bad happens."

"How dare you threaten me. I am not one of your minions, you will not intimidate me." Lily smiled suddenly "Tell me, are you going to _handle me _yourself, or will you get someone to do it for you.?"

Narcissa was confused for a moment, but then her eyes got wider with understanding. She pulled out her wand and held it to Lily's throat. "You little sneak, what do you know about the conversation I had with Severus."

"Enough to support what I always thought of you." Lily slapped Narcissa's wand away. Narcissa grabbed a hand full of Lily's hair and slammed her into the cupboard again.

"I do not need anyone to fight my battles. If you cannot learn how to respect your superiors I will teach you how."

Lily was so furious she refused to let Narcissa see her look away first, so she continued to stare into those ice cold blue eyes. Lily noticed a slight change in those eyes. They went from hate to…hunger? Lily was taken aback slightly. "Go head, teach me a lesson." Her voice quivered slightly.

Before Narcissa could stop herself, she was leaning forward. Their lips met and there was no hesitancy. The kissed deepened and Narcissa found her hands roaming over the petite form. Lily gasped in surprise as she felt Narcissa hands roaming her thighs. Lily for once couldn't think right, this just felt too good to think about who she was doing it with. Narcissa finally got a hold of herself and pushed Lily away. The two girls stared at each other for a few second and Narcissa looked at Lily in pure horror. "No, no, no…"

Lily saw a flash of fear in Narcissa and reached out. "It's o-"

"Don't say anything. Just…just…" Narcissa turned around, picked up her things, and fled. Lily slid to the floor and touched her lips lightly. _What in the world just happened?_

_***_

Narcissa felt so ashamed of herself, not only did she allow herself to think those disgraceful thoughts, but she acted on impulse. This wasn't the first time she thought about girls, or even Lily in fact. '_NO NOT Lily, Evans.' _she reminded herself_. 'Mordred, that mudblood had better not tell a soul.' _

_***_

Lily woke up early the next morning, and felt horrible. She was sure her back was bruised. Lily made her way down to breakfast. She decided to keep quiet about the events that had occurred last night. Narcissa was cruel, manipulative, and evil; that's all she had to replay in her mind if she wanted to distract herself enough not to think about Narcissa's lips…or hands. _'Oh dear…just breathe. Cruel… evil… manipulative… cruel… evil… manipula-'_

"Morning!" Alice sat down cheerfully and sat down.

"Hi, you seem so cheerful this morning." Lily tried to ignore the heat rising and the color she knew showed on her face.

"It is the weekend after all, the sun is out…" Alice went on without noticing anything. "I have a date!" Alice squealed, which caused people to stare.

"How lovely, why didn't you tell me?" Lily looked around uneasily.

"I only got asked out last night, and you went straight t bed when you got in. I cannot believe Frank asked me. He is so dreamy" Lily noticed Alice's eyes glaze over slightly.

"Well I'm off to the library… Alice?"

"Yeah ok." Alice smiled contently and continued to stare dreamily at the ceiling.

Lily smiled to herself and left the Great Hall. It was an amazing day to get a lot of studying done.

Some time later Lily walked towards the common room. She had missed lunch, but had gotten two whole chapter ahead in charms. Lily's calm was disturbed by a terrible scream. Lily turned around quickly and sprinted down the corridor. She froze in horror at the top of the staircase. At the foot of the stairs she saw a figure in green and black robes, long chestnut hair and limbs entangled everywhere, and a pool of blood. Lily sprinted down the stairs and knelt beside the girl. She heard footsteps behind her, but before she could see who it was, she felt the force of a curse hit her. Everything went black.

***

Narcissa was sitting at her favorite seat by the fire when Lucius stormed in. He grabbed her by the arm and pulled. "Come with me now." She stood quickly and followed. They climbed the stairs to Lucius' dormitory and entered. "Get out!" Lucius commanded as Crabbe and Goyle left immediately. Lucius had a famous temper and they were smart enough to know not to get in the way of it.

"Darling, what-"

"I was so close and that old fool-"

"Please Lucius, tell me what happened. " Narcissa knew better than to interrupt him, but she needed to know the complete story. Lucius turned red and glared at her. For a moment, Narcissa thought he might hit her. Lucius let out a long sigh and sat his bed.

"I figured today was a good day to take care of Cassandra. She was on her was to the library when she had an 'accident', poor wench fell down the stairs. I was going to finish her off when that filthy mudblood, Ms. Evans, decided she wanted to play hero. I was able to knock her unconscious, but none other than Dumbledore showed up"

Narcissa gasped. "He didn't see you, did h-"

"Close your mouth, I don't recall dating a fish. Do you think I'm so daft that I would allow that." Lucius snapped. "I heard him coming and hid. He swept the girls away."

Narcissa didn't want to say anything, but Dumbledore noticed more than he lead on.

Lucius continued, "We need to get to the hospital wing before she opens her mouth."

Narcissa knew 'we' meant herself. "Let's wait till more people know Cassandra's in the hospital wing. Then it won't be conspicuous.

"We do not have that-"

"Look, sweetheart, news like this travels fast. It will not be long until everyone knows."

Lucius grabbed Narcissa by the neck and squeezed. Narcissa's eyed widened and she tried to pry his had off her throat. "Do not interrupt me" He let go and straightened his robes. "Let us go into the common room darling." Seeing how rattled Narcissa was Lucius cupped her cheek and gave Narcissa a soft kiss. "My sweet, I wouldn't have to be so… forceful if you simply learned not to anger me." Lucius grasped her hand and they walked down the stairs. Narcissa concentrated on breathing steady fought the tears that were threatening to show how weak she was. Lucius had promised her that he wouldn't treat her like that anymore. He was slowly becoming a monster, just like his father.

"Lucius, have you heard?" Bella broke through her thoughts. "Poor, poor Cassandra's in the hospital. Apparently they have not been able to revive her, and that mudblood seems to be there and unconscious also. What a party, don't you think?" Bella laughed sadistically.

"I think she will need company when she wakes." Narcissa took the initiative and left. As soon as she rounded a corner, she steeled herself against the wall. Not only was she upset by Lucius' behavior, but Lily was in the hospital. It hit her like a ton of cobblestones. _'No, No! It was not Lily, it was Ms. Evans. Her being in the hospital was a good thing. It WAS a good thing, it was…right?'_

_***_

_Author's note: So I just wanted everyone to know that I do not think that being an abuse victim makes you weak. Just throwing it out there. So yes Narcissa is a bit messed up, but then again… aren't we all. Well I'm curious to see what happens next. Hope you feel the same way :p_


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: Sorry about the delay. School's been hectic, track practice makes me exhausted and I got caught reading all these really good fanfics sooo sorry.I would also like to thank all the people who reviewed my story So thank all TWO of you. Thanks, you TWO rock. Please other people feel free to join the other two people on my good list. I came up with another disclaimer.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own any of characters or the concept of Harry Potter and this magical world. I do however own this plot, so don't steal it. If you do steal it I fill find you and perhaps use crucio on you, That's right I said it. Now that we have the unpleasantries out the way, please enjoy the story.**

_*******_

**Narcissa's head was spinning. Lucius upset her so much, and on top of that, he had put Lily in the hospital. **_**'No, no, Lil- No Evans in the hospital was good.'**_** When Narcissa made it to the hospital wing she stood by the door for a moment. She took a deep breath and reached for the door handle when the door opened. James and Sirius walked out and stopped. **

"**What are you doing here? Haven't you done enough?" James hissed.**

""**Moi? I have not done anything, and you would do best to keep your accusations to yourself, Potter. Now move out of my way, I have a housemate to visit."**

"**Cousin" jumped in Sirius, "What could possibly make you feign interest in someone other than yourself. What are you covering up?"**

"**Typical bleeding heart Gryffindors blame the big bad Slytherins for all their problems. Have you failed to notice that one of my own is in there?"**

"**Please Cissy, it wouldn't be the first time you snakes hexed each other in the back."**

"**I am done humoring you gits." She pushed past them. "And DO NOT call me Cissy."**

**Narcissa looked around for Madame Brunner. When she finally spotted her, she headed over. "Hello Madame Brunner." Narcissa put on her best worried face. "Would you mind if I sat with Cassandra?"**

"**Ah, Ms. Reiter. She has yet to regain consciousness, but I do not see any harm if you are quiet." **

"**Of course…um do you mind if I ask what happened."**

"**Well, both Ms. Reiter and Ms. Evan were found at the bottom of a staircase. We could assume they had a fight, but that is highly unlikely. We simply have to wait till they come to."**

"**Thank you, I'll call if she wakes." Narcissa walked over to Cassandra's bed, and saw that Lily was only one bed over. Narcissa was relieved to see that Lily did not look hurt. She looked quite peaceful in her spelled slumber. Cassandra on the other hand did not look so good. She was pale and looked distressed in her unconscious slumber. Narcissa settled herself between the two girls. After about two minutes of sitting uncomfortably she stood up, and went by Lily's side. Narcissa could not understand what drew her to this feeble person. Narcissa could think of a million reasons as to why Lily was a disgraceful witch. **

'_**First of all, she's muggle born. That alone counts as 500 reasons.' **_**Narcissa thought convincingly to herself. '**_**Second, she was a know it all. Third… third… um…she had unruly red frizz for hair. **_**Unaware of what she was doing, Narcissa began to run her fingers through Lily's hair. **_**Fourth… well she had those gorgeous emerald eyes that were hidden for the moment, those lips. **_**She ran her fingers along Lily's delicate features. Lily's eyes fluttered momentarily and Narcissa drew her hand back.**_** 'Please, don't wake up. Don't wake up.'**_** When she was sure that Lily was not going to wake, she resettled herself in between the two beds. Now to wait.**

*******

**Lily felt something as her mind swam towards consciousness. She could swear someone was running their finger through her hair and over her face. Maybe it was her mother, but no… wasn't she at school. Alice… Remus… James… too much thinking. She felt comfort as the dark swirled around her and pulled her back. **

*******

**A while later, Narcissa was restless. **_**How long was this going to take? **_**She heard a slight movement and looked at Cassandra's bed. Cassandra started to breathe heavier and her eyes flew open. Narcissa got up and moved to Cassandra's side. Cassandra's eyes widened with confusion and fear. **

"**Shhh, now we don't want Madame Brunner to get worried, right? Calm down, I wanted to make sure that you were ok. You took a very nasty fall. Thank Mordred, you're still alive." Narcissa leaned over Cassandra. "Now, do you remember what happened?"**

"**I slipped and fell." Cassandra whispered.**

**Narcissa smiled. "Good girl, if you keep that story I might tell Lucius to let you live to see the end of this school year. Understand?"**

**Cassandra nodded, close to tears she tried to control herself. Narcissa looked at her in disgust and waited till she pulled herself together.**

"**Madame Brunner, she's awake." Narcissa stood back as the nurse bustled in to do her duty. **

"**Ms. Reiter, how do you feel?" She started to perform a few spells to check her patient's health.**

"**Fine, a bit of a headache though." Cassandra looked nervously at Narcissa.**

"**Well, you took quite a spill. Do you remember what happened?"**

"**I was walking to the library, and I… I slipped at the top of the stairs. I don't remember much after." **

**Madame Brunner clicked her tongue and shook her head sympathetically. "Were you with Ms. Evans?"**

**Cassandra looked confused. "No, why would I be with her?"**

"**She was found at the bottom of the staircase, unconscious. Keep resting while I summon the headmaster." Madame Brunner left them, and Cassandra looked at Lily. She was still very confused.**

**Narcissa didn't feel like being there when the headmaster arrived. Too many potential questions. Narcissa went back to Cassandra's side and pointed towards Lily. "If she wakes and asks questions, which I know she will, tell her the same thing you told the nurse." Cassandra nodded and Narcissa left. Cassandra felt relived and scared. She wasn't going to reveal the truth, but was still nervous. Blacks, Malfoys, any Slytherins were not to be trusted. **_**Now how did this Gryffindor come into this…**_

*******

**Narcissa walked into the empty common room, and saw Lucius reading by the fireplace. It wasn't that late. Usually people were still mulling around at this hour. She walked over as he raised his head to greet her.**

"**Is the situation under control."**

'_**What a lovely greeting. Such the perfect boyfriend.' **_**Narcissa thought "Yes, Evans is still unconscious, but Reiter knows what she has to say." Narcissa turned to walk up to her dormitory. Lucius got up and grabbed Narcissa by the waist.**

"**Where are you off to so quickly." He whispered in her ear. "You're not still upset are you, darling?" Lucius' voice was hinting toward something Narcissa was I no mood for.**

"**I am exhausted. I want to go to sleep." Narcissa tried to walk away, but with no such luck. Lucius had a tight grip. **

"**I am truly sorry. I was very unsettled earlier, but you know I will never seriously hurt you. I love you."**

**Never seriously hurt her, was he joking. "So it is ok If you hurt me as long as it's not serious. You promised-" **

"**Get a hold of yourself." Lucius turned her around. "Stop being so weak, you are no child; do not whine."**

"**I am going to bed." Narcissa tried to pull away again, but Lucius held on to her.**

"**You will go to bed when I tell you to. Now I want to spent time with my girlfriend." Lucius sat down and pulled Narcissa with him. "Don't worry about anyone bothering us. Everyone knows tonight to stay in their dormitories unless they want to end up like Ms. Reiter."**

**Narcissa felt a spike of fear. So this was the reason the common room was empty. She knew people would listen to him, and she also knew what Lucius must have in mind. "I'm really not in the mo-"**

"**Shhh. There is not a need to talk." Lucius kissed her softly. "Darling, you know I love you." His hand slowly crept up her thigh.**

"**Please, Lucius." Narcissa whispered desperately. "If you love me you won't do this."**

"**You are quite mistaken. I am doing this because I love you." He kissed her again. This time it wasn't soft. There was no more pretending. Narcissa panicked as pushed her down. **

**Tears spilled out of her eyes, "Please, please you can-" Lucius smacked her hard across the face. **

"**I will do as I please. Not one word." Narcissa squeezed her eyes shut and tilted her head back. She could not believe this. This was not suppose to happen; at least not to her. Was she not a powerful pureblood Black? How could she let this worthless man disgrace her like this?**

**Lucius took off her pants and unbuttoned her shirt. He trailed kisses from her neck down to her stomach. Narcissa shivered in disgust. He swiftly slid her underwear down, and pushed open her legs. She heard him unzip his pants and cried harder. She cried out as he thrust into her. She willed herself to stop feeling. She prayed to go numb, but she felt everything. She felt each thrust, his fingers digging into her hips, his breath on her neck… After what seemed like years he came inside her. He pulled out and stood up. Narcissa still had yet to open her eyes. **

**As Lucius zipped his pants he looked at her in disgust. "Once again you find yourself sprawled on your back like a common prostitute." He laughed and walked to his dormitory. **

**When she heard his footsteps die away she gathered her things and fled to the showers. She tossed her clothes aside and walked into the stall. She turned the water on scalding hot and dropped to the floor. Her racking sobs echoed off the tiles. She stared at the water going down the drain. She desperately hoped to wash away the shame, embarrassment, and disgust that clung to her skin. Narcissa curled in a ball and tried to forget the world.**

*******

**Lily found herself pulling toward consciousness again. She opened her eyes and saw dark shapes everywhere. Soon her vision cleared and she found herself looking at the ugly bland colors of the hospital wing. '**_**What in the world?'**_** Lily's mind felt fuzzy and she couldn't remember why she was in the hospital. She swung her legs over the side of the bed and touched the cold, stone floor. She quickly retracted her feet. '**_**Too cold.'**_

**Madame Brunner quickly made her way to Lily's bed. Lily was surprised to see the nurse come out so quickly. "Don't be shocked deary. Do you really think I wouldn't prepare for one of my unconscious patient trying to run away." The nurse laughed. "Simple alarm charm to let me know when you got out of bed. Now lie down, you are in no shape for excess activity." Madame Brunner started to perform a few spells to make sure Lily was healthy. **

"**How do you feel?"**

"**Ok, my mind is a bit fuzzy. I do not understand why I am here."**

"**You do not remember what happened? You were found at the bottom of a staircase."**

**Lily had a flash of memory. **_**'Blood, chestnut hair…' **_**Lily's forehead wrinkled as she tried hard to remember. "She was at the bottom of the staircase. She was bleeding…uh I don't know what else." Lily's head hurt. **_**'Why was this so hard?'**_

"**Darling, do not work yourself up. Sometimes it takes time to recall an event after coming out of a bout of unconsciousness. It's about midnight. Go back to sleep and we'll try this again when you wake."**

**Lily laid back down. She closed her eyes and hoped she would remember in the morning. Too bad she couldn't go back to sleep anyway. She tossed back the blankets and got out of bed again. The nurse didn't rush out so Lily looked under the bed to find something to slip on her feet. She found some sandals and slipped them on. There was someone on the bed by her, she figured it would be the girl with the chestnut hair. **

**Lily pulled back the curtain. The girl with the chestnut hair was a Slytherin. Lily vaguely remembered seeing her around. **_**'Hmp. Sixth year?' **_**Lily shut the curtain, part of her felt like she was intruding. She went over to the window. The moon was full and it lit up the grounds gorgeously. She loved full moons, something about it made her feel at peace. She was about to return to her bed when she saw three figures crossing the ground. **_**'Is that James, Sirius, Peter! What are they doing out at this time. Why are they going towards the whomping willow. What the-' **_**No this was too much for Lily. The prefect in her wanted answers, but she fought against it. She retreated to her bed. They could try to tickle that tree for all she cared. She closed her eyes and willed sleep to come. Maybe if she would have stayed at the window she could have witnessed something very interesting.**

*******

_**Author's note:**_

_**And so we've come to a close. I hope you have enjoyed. I didn't plan on writing the whole rape thing, but it happened. I hope your not too upset. If you have any questions, comments, or complaints feel free to review. Until next time Au Revoir.**_


	4. Chapter 4

This chapter is dedicated to Snakequeen-in-Norway, thanks for giving me a little push to keep writing. I know it's been a while, but I'm back. Please enjoy.

Dippet sat in his office. He was drinking tea, but wished it was something a little stronger. Dumbledore sat across from him, calmly sipping his tea. The room was slightly tense, so Dumbledore decided to break the silence.

"Lemon drop?"

The headmaster looked up with a stern look on his face. "I hardly think this is the time Albus."

The professor smiled and his eyes twinkled. "My apologies, may I inquire as to why you invited me here? I would love to think of it is as a social visit, but I seem to think you have a motive behind your actions."

The headmaster sighed. "Ms. Reiter says she fell, but it doesn't make sense. How does Ms. Evans just become unconscious? I believe there might be some foul play. You found them. What are your thoughts Albus?"

Dumbledore leaned back slightly and stroked his beard thoughtfully. "I agree with your assumption, but we can only go on what the young ladies tell us. I suggest we simply wait and monitor for now. Hopefully by tomorrow morning, Ms. Evans will remember a little more of the events that occurred."

The headmaster sighed again. He was well aware that they really could not do anything, but he hoped Albus would have one of his famous ideas. Everyone knew Albus Dumbledore was the most powerful, intelligent wizard of the age, perhaps a couple ages. This man had defeated Grindlewald and for some unforeseen reason he became a teacher. Headmaster Dippet looked at the man that sat before him. The great powerful wizard…had started humming a Weird Sister tune. Dippet smiled despite himself.

"You are always level headed in spite of all and any type of adversity. How you manage it is beyond me."

The great wizard smiled and nodded towards the headmaster. "I shall take my leave." As he approached the door he turned again to face the headmaster. "One day someone will accept a lemon drop." He left at the sound of a small chuckle.

Lily woke again with a splitting headache. She squinted against the blaring hospital lights and groaned. Madame Brunner quickly went over to Lily's bed and began performing all types of spells to see that her patient was healthy. Lily tried not to wince, but couldn't help it. _'God. Too many lights.'_

"Too many lights. My head it-"

"Shh shh." The nurse clucked her tongue sympathetically. "Hear Ms. Evans drink this. It should kick in immediately. Just lie down while I get your breakfast. The headmaster will be down in about an hour."

Lily sat back while the nurse brought over her tray of breakfast. Her head no longer hurt and her mind was clearing up rapidly. She ate quietly and watched the nurse go over to the Slytherin's bed. The nurse set her tray aside and pulled open the curtain surrounding the bed.

"Good morning Ms. Reiter. I have some potions for you, and then you can eat breakfast."

Madame Brunner went about her check-up as Lily tried to watch inconspicuously. Cassandra however was not to be fooled; she felt Lily's gaze on her. Cassandra shot Lily a dirty look, hoping she would get the message. Lily looked at her plate of food quickly. The nurse left the room and the only sound left was the scraping of silverware on plates. Lily tried to keep to herself, but there were too many questions. _'Reiter… it sounded so familiar. Her first name starts with a C. Clarissa… no. Damn, Cassie? No... CASSANDRA.' _Lily jumped as she remembered the girl's name. Then she remembered where she was and turned a slight shade of pink. Cassandra shot her a hostile look, but said nothing.

"Uh… Cassandra, right?"

"What's it to you?"

"I was… uh…wondering." Lily finished lamely. "I uh… well… What happened? I heard a scream, found you bleeding at the bottom of a staircase."

"I fell." _'Stupid, nosy mudblo-'_

"So you just fell?"

"YES, I fell."She snapped. Cassandra tried to muster up her most threatening voice. "Now stop talking to me. It is bad enough I have to endure your presence. I refuse to endure your company."

Lily was taken aback slightly. She resumed eating her meal. _'Fell? No, how dumb does she think I am?' _

"I know I was cursed. You really expect me to think that you fell. It makes no sense. Who are you trying to cover up for?"

"I really hope you are not calling me a liar. Now. Stop. Talking. To. Me."

Lily had to stop herself from growling. _'Why are all these stupid Slytherins so damn impossible?' _

She knew asking any more questions would be futile. Silence filled the room and Lily could swear she felt it eat away at her mind. Lily stared up at the ceiling tiles and let her mind drift.

"Lily!"

Lily snapped back to reality.

"Alice, shhh." She scolded. "Have you lost your mind? This is a hospital wing."

"Sorry, I was so worried. When I came last night, you were still out of it." Alice rushed over and gave Lily a hug. "How are you feeling? What happened?"

Lily whispered what happened and told her she suspected Cassandra knew more than she let on.

Alice looked very serious for a moment. "Lily, I know you want answers, but I think you should let it go."

"LET IT GO?" The she remembered why she was whispering in the first place. Cassandra glared at them. "Are you insane? How could I possibly shrug this off?"

"It's not like they threw a harmless jinx at her. Someone pushed her down the stairs! What do you think they will do to the person who has been sticking her nose where it doesn't belong?"She whispered heatedly.

"I'm not going to let them get away with this."

"You don't even know who they are. Please just leave it alone."

Lily was going to respond, but the headmaster walked in.

"Think about what I said. I'll see you later."

Narcissa was curled up on her bed in the fetal position. She had ten minutes to get ready for breakfast, but couldn't will herself to get up. Her eyes were bloodshot and hazy; if only sleep would have come to her last night. Every time she closed her eyes, horrible images danced across her eyelids. Choking back sobs, she threw the covers over her head as she heard the door open.

"Mordred, Cissy, are you really still in bed? Lucius is waiting." Bellatrix walked over to her sister's bed and pulled the covers off. "What the hell happened to you? You look like shit."

"Get out, Bella."

"Do you really want to piss off Lucius? He's already impa-"

"I don't give a fuck about him. Now leave."

"Is that what this is about? Did you two have a wittle spat?" She said mockingly.

Narcissa's fury spurred. "Don't you dare talk to me like I'm a child." Narcissa hissed at her sister. "You have no idea what he did. NONE!" Again she had to choke back a sob.

Smack!

Narcissa looked up at her sister shocked, unconsciously touching her red cheek.

"Awww. Did he huwt you? Did he make you cwy." Bella said in her baby voice. "Suck it up and get a fucking hold of yourself. I will not allow you to screw this up. Lucius is powerful, rich, and picked out by our parents, especially for you. You will not shame our family with your stupidity. What, do you want to end up like Andromeda,huh, loving some dirty muggle, disowned by our family? Get ready and clean yourself up." Bellatrix growled as she dragged her sister off the bed. "I am going to tell Lucius that you will be ready in fifteen minutes." With that Bella left.

"Hello Ms. Evans."

"Hello headmaster."

"How are you feeling? Madame Brunner tells me your memory was a bit off last night.."

"I feel much better. My mind is clearer and I remember what happened. I was returning to my common room, from the library, when I heard a scream. I ran towards the direction of the scream and I saw Cassandra at the bottom of the staircase. I went down to see if she was okay and was cursed from behind."

"So, you didn't see your attacker?"

"No, sir."

"We are investigating, but for now express extreme caution. Please try not to travel alone."

"Yes, sir."

"Madame Brunner says you are free to go. However you,Ms. Reiter," The headmastre looked over to the girl who was pretending not to listen. "are being asked to stay another day or two."

"Yes, Headmaster."

"Now, I shall take my leave."

Fifteen minutes and some quick spells later Narcissa made her entrance in the common room, looking as put together as always. Those around her would see nothing wrong, but the people who knew her best, not that there were many, or the people who would have the decency to look close enough, would see the the pain she held deep within her eyes.

"Darling, I thought you'd leave me waiting for you all day." Lucius stated maliciously.

"Where is everybody?"

"I told them to go ahead without us. There was no point in the both of us being rude."

Narcissa said nothing, not wanting to take the bate. Lucius grabbed her arm and pulled her to his chest. "Sweetheart, what's wrong? You haven't even given me a good morning kiss."

"Just stop. I'm tired of your games. Stop trying to act as if nothing's wrong." Despite using all her will power, she began to cry.

"Oh darling, shh. I'm so sorry. You know I never meant to hurt you. If you would stop being so stubbo-"

"No! Don't you dare try to blame this on me. Take responsibility for your own actions."

"I'm sorry." Lucius whispered as he ran his fingers through her hair. "I don't deserve you, but I promise to make it up to you. You have to be patient with me."

"You promised me."

"I know. I made a mistake."

Narcissa pulled away from him. "I refuse to go through this anymore."

"And you won't."

"Not anymore?" The ice princess thawed, asking almost begging."

"I love you. I don't want to hurt you and I won't."

She knew better than to trust his words. She knew he was a liar. She knew this was all an act. This was the act he had perfected through the years; one that she knew all too well. She knew he would do it again; perhaps worse. She also knew none of that mattered. This man was her future and she had no choice but to believe him, to give him another chance... to love him.

"Let me clean myself up." Lucius watched her walk back up to her dormitory, and smiled to himself.

_'This is just too easy.'_

Lily sat at dinner slightly disgruntled. She knew all her question would not be answered anytime soon. It was just so hard for her to let things go, especially big things like this. She looked over at the Slytherin table. _'They know something.' _The redhead scanned the table and her eyes fell on the target. Narcissa sat by her boyfriend and across from her sister. Lily almost sneered at Lucius. She knew he was beyond evil.

She looked over to Narcissa again and stopped. Something was wrong. Narcissa always dominated the room with her presence, but not today. Today, Narcissa seemed just to fade into everyone else, as if she had lost the essence of her personality. Usually she held her head high and looked down on those she felt inferior to herself, but today her dignity seemed to have vanished.

Lily spent the rest of the evening watching her subject to see if she could find the cause of her troubles.

After a while, she thought she might have found the cause when Lucius leaned over to give Narcissa a peck on the cheek. Lily noticed Narcissa still as if to keep herself from flinching away. Lily vowed to herself that she would at least solve one of the two mysteries.

An hour later, Lily found herself in the potions room. She told herself she was there to figure out a potion for class, but she knew her real reason. She hoped to see Narcissa, but even if that happened, what would she say. She wasn't even alone. Severus also happened to pick that day to get some potions work done.

"Damn." Lily had messed up again. _'Why is this stupid potion so hard?'_

Severus smiled to himself. He knew why she kept messing up. _'Should I help her? No no she'll figure it out. Maybe if I gi-"_

"Umm... Severus?"

He froze. _'Can she hear my thoughts?' _He cleared his throat. "Yes, Lily?"

"I'm sorry to be a bother, but I noticed that we're working on the same potion and ,well, you're not messing up like me." Lily smiled. "You think you could help me figure out what I'm doing wrong?"

"I... uhh...umm. Yea."

"Thanks." Severus' heart almost melted at the look of content and relief on her face.

_S_everus walked over to her cauldron and peered inside. "It's a common mistake. You forgot to take the cauldron of the fire when you added the dragonfly wings."

"Oh, I did. Merlin where is my mind?" Severus felt the all too familiar butterflies as he looked at the flush on her face.

"Thanks Sev, you're always so helpful."

"No problem." Just at that moment the door was opened and Narcissa walked in, and glared at the scene that met her eyes. Severus was standing there, grinning, like a lovesick fool, and Lily slightly flushed.

"Um... I have to go. Bye, Lily." Severus rushed out. He hoped Narcissa wouldn't use his to embarrass him later on. Narcissa set up her cauldron and pretended there was no one else in the room.

Lily gathered her things and went to the door. As she was about to leave she stopped and turned around. _'Come on Lily. Where is your Griffindor bravery.' _Then she turned around again. _'Maybe I'll have it tomorrow.'_

"Get the hell out or close the damn door, you're letting a draft in."

Lily jumped _'Damn, what do I do?' _She closed the door. _'Okay jus-'_

"Is there something you need. I'd rather not have you standing there like a mudblood idiot, breathing my air."

"Who the hell do you think you are? Your air? Do you really think that highly of yourself?" Lily said hotly.

"Look Evans, I suggest you find someone else to bother."

"Or what?"

"Those sound like fighting words."

"You think you're so tough do you? Answer a question then."

Narcissa laughed. "No, there isn't any hope for the worthless mudblood population. Yes, you will always be inferior to me. Yes, you should go end your worthless li-"

"Why did you kiss me." said Lily, not being phased by anything Narcissa was saying. "You sure are quiet now. Please, all mighty bitch." Lily spat venomously. "Tell me." Lily didn't know where all this came from. She never acted this way, but why stop now. She walked up to Narcissa and pushed her away from her cauldron. "It's rude to keep people waiting."

Narcissa snapped and punched Lily, right in the face.

a/n so I thought that was a nice place to stop. Don't you just love the cliffies? I'll make a deal, you review and I'll update another chapter soon. KK. Peace out :)


	5. Chapter 5

Sorry about the wait. Microsoft word and I had a fight and I lost. So I had to retype everything. Then I started college and well… it's been a big adventure.

Disclaimer: I do not own these characters. I simply bend them to my will and make them do my bidding.

Lily's head snapped back from the impact, blood spouted out of her nose.

"Shut up! I don't have to explain myself to you."

Lily felt her blood boil. This was it; she was done taking crap from this Slytherin. Lily lunged at Narcissa. The both crashed to the floor. Lily tried to pull herself up, but punches were being delivered to her stomach. Lily swung her arms wildly, hitting Narcissa in the face. They backed away from each other, both momentarily assessing the damage.

'_Damn, that hurt.' _Lily clutched her stomach.

'_Am I bleeding? No one makes me bleed.' _Narcissa took out her wand and sent a hex in Lily's direction. Lily fell back and clutched her arm.

'_A stinging hex, really?' _Lily rolled out the way as another hex came sailing in her direction. The flash of light of inches away from her face. She lunged at Narcissa again. This time she made sure to securely pin down the blond. Lily lowered her head, looking at the struggling girl beneath her.

"You still haven't answered my question." Lily managed to get out in between breaths.

"Why does it matter?" Narcissa avoided the redhead's gaze. "It meant nothing."

"It did to me." Lily let go of Narcissa's arm and ran her fingers across the blonde's cheek. "Just tell me why."

Narcissa closed her eyes and tilted her head towards those fingers. How long had it been since Lucius had touched her this delicately, because he loved her and not to manipulate her? Narcissa felt warmth spread through her body. Narcissa met the gaze of those intense, gorgeous emerald eyes, and remembered why she had been avoiding them. Those eyes tore into her. Lily knew the answer to her question, but Narcissa would affirm it; if only to get those eyes to stop.

"I wanted… to feel. I gave into my impulses. I wanted to know how your lips felt."

Lily closed the distance between herself and her enemy. She tasted Narcissa's blood and faintly remembered splitting Narcissa's lip. It didn't matter though. How could anything matter now?

Narcissa was internally freaking out. How could she lose herself again? She needed to gain control, but maybe this could last a little longer. Narcissa slip her newly freed arm around Lily's waist and flipped them over. _'That's right, I'm in control.' _She dipped head, ready to capture Lily's lips but the door opened and Professor Slughorn walked in.

Lily smiled as she lay back in the hospital wing. True, her body hurt, she had some bruises, twenty points had been taken away from Gryffindor and she had detention for three days, BUT that didn't matter. Progress had been made, and the rest was worth with.

Narcissa on the other hand was very disgruntled; her body hurt, she had bruises, she had blood on her expensive robes, twenty points had been taken away from Slytherin, and she had detention for three days. She looked over to her side and saw the smile on Lily's face. _'Stupid girl.' _Narcissa scowled. _'How do I allow her to get through my defenses?'_

Both girls were snapped out of their reveries by the sound of the angry nurse. "Care to explain what in the world went through your minds? Prefects, the both of you!" Both girls were smart enough not to answer. Lily took the small smile off her face and mustered up a nice guilty look. "I do not know what this new generation is coming too." She turned towards Lily. "_DID I NOT JUST RELEASE YOU!" _She threw her hands up and sighed. "You two are free to go. I've fixed the worst of it, but you will keep those bruises to remind you of your stupidity. Now clean yourselves up!"

Both girls practically jumped out of the hospital beds. They did not need to be told twice. Narcissa tried to quickly get away, but was blocked by Lily. Lily grabbed Narcissa's arm.

"Narcissa, please."

The Ice Princess's first instinct was to pull away, fight, curse, be rude, but she couldn't. Lily's touch felt too inviting and those eyes gazed so intently.

"Please, what?"

"I don't want to fight anymore. It doesn't have to be this way."

"Do you really think I will openly associate with you?" She wanted her words to hurt, bite into her opponent, but Lily's wince made her feel guilt in the pit of her stomach.

This hot and cold act was getting old fast. _'She kisses me. She hates me, tries to hex me. We make out, now she hates me… again. What the heck?"_

"No one has to know. I just want to get to know you."

"Why in the world do you want to get to know me?"

"I want to know that the person who kissed me is not as bad as she makes herself out to be. I want to distinguish the real you from the person you promote to the school."

"This is the real me. Stop trying to fool yourself."

"I don't believe that. I am not so naïve as you would love for me to be. Please, just give me a chance."

Narcissa did not know what it was that made her want to agree. Maybe it was the fact that Lily sounded sincere. _'Get to know me?' _Lucius would never care enough to know anything about her. All he needed to know was that she was a pureblood, wealthy, and loyal to him. Though the latter wasn't as important, he could beat that into her.

Her eyes watered as images from last night danced in her vision. She squeezed her eyes shut. _'No, there was no time for this.'_

Lily noticed the sudden change in the girl she had been pleading with. First her gaze had been calculating. Then those eyes turned into tormented orbs. Those eyes chilled Lily down to her bones.

"Please tell me what's wrong." Lily reached out, but Narcissa backed away.

"I have to go." Narcissa whispered. She turned to leave and was stopped in her tracks.

"I know this has something to do with Lucius. What did he do to you?"

'_How does she know?' _Narcissa was momentarily stunned, but got a hold of herself rather quickly. "Excuse me?" She asked venomously.

Lily took a step back. _'Shoot. Wrong thing to say.'_

"I know there is something wrong with you. At dinner you were acting… strangely."

"So now you've been watching me mudblood! You don't know anything about me. Leave it to the Gryffindors to make outlandish accusations in situations that do not involve themselves."

"I have not been watching you. I just noti-"

"QUIET!"

Lily took another step back and tried not to tremble. She could tell that Narcissa was beyond angry.

"You really don't know when to stop. Let me help you." Narcissa made sure to clearly pronounce each word. "Stop now. Your accusations stop now. This thing, whatever the bloody hell it is, between you and I, stops now." Narcissa turned again and walked away.

Lily flopped down on her bed. That hadn't worked out like she had hoped. _'I'll figure this out, but for now… charms' _Lilypulled out her Charms text and began to study. About an hour into her studies the door creaked open.

Lily looked up for a moment. "Hello Alice, what's u…p. What?" Lily paused for a moment. _'Why is she looking at me like that?'_

"Who busted you lip?"

"Oh, that."

"Oh, that! What happened to you."

"Narcissa and I got into a fight."

"Merlin, Narcissa beat you up. You poor thing. I hope she got detention and points deducted. She cannot go around treating people like shit!"

"Hang on. I did not get beat up. We fought, as in we both threw punches. I did some damage as well. And how many times do I have to tell you to watch your language?"

Alice rolled her eyes. "Yes mummy, I'll be a good girl and watch how I speak. So tell me what happened."

"I was in the potions classroom. What!"

"What!"

"Don't you what me. You know very well what. You made a face when I said 'I was in the potions classroom.' "

"That is typical of you, that's all."

"Typical of me? What do you mean by that?"

"You get released from the hospital and instead of resting you go and make potions."

"So? There is nothing wrong with wanting to keep my studies up. A hospital stay is no excuse to be lazy."

"Yeah it is."

"Yes not yeah, and no it's not."

"Yes mum."

"You want to hear what happened or not?" Alice nodded. "Good. Now be quiet. Back to what I was saying, I was in the potions classroom. Severus was helping me with a potion, because I was having a bit of trouble. What?"

"What?"

"You know very well what. You made that face when I said Severus."

"He's creepy, why would you go to him for help?"

Lily looked at Alice sternly. "He is not creepy. Severus is very nice, sweet and polite."

Alice made a face, as if she was going to vomit. "Ewww, Lily, what are you in love with him or something?'

Lily felt her face heat up. "No I am not." Alice smiled slyly. "Why are you so vile? I refuse to fall back in my studies. I needed help and he helped me."

"How are you going to fall back? You do realize you are potions ahead of everyone else, right?"

"That is not the point." Lily took a deep breath. "Either you listen or I will not tell you anything."

"Go on and stop being so dramatic."

"Then, Narcissa came in and Severus left." _'Then I asked her why she kissed me.' _"Then she started to verbally attack me." _'I got in her face and shoved her.' _"And she hit me and we started to fight."

"She is so horrible."

"Professor Slughorn came in and deducted twenty points from each of our houses and gave us three days of detention."

"That's tough."

"Yes, but I have to put that behind me. I hope Professor Slughorn doesn't think any less of me."

"You are a perfect student. It's about time you get into some trouble. Don't look at me like that. She has been treating you horrible for years. We all knew you were going crack sooner or later."

"I did not _crack._"

"You got into a fight."

"She attacked me."

"Fair enough." Alice flopped down next to Lily. "Enough of that. I have to tell you about my date with Frank."

"_Frank Frank Frank."_ Lily said in an annoyingly high pitched voice.

"Shut up, now listen."

Narcissa made her way to the dungeons. She was just furious. Leave it to the know-it-all redhead to infer things that were true. _'Where does she get off…watching me…urgh. How did she know!'_

Narcissa pushed open the door to the girl's restroom. It was empty, so she went over to the sinks. _'Mordred, I look awful.' _A quick glamour fixed her appearance. Too bad it did nothing for the way she felt inside. She braced herself against the sink, took deep breaths and composed herself. _'She is nothing to me. I have a boyfriend. We are very happy.' _The blond continued to recite this over and over in her head as she made her way to the common room. If only lying to herself was easier done than said.


	6. Chapter 6

A/N: So it has been a really long time, but here's a new chapter. Enjoy.

The next week went by in a blur for Narcissa. She kept her mask up and tried to act like her usual cold self. No one noticed the change. Her sister was happy that she acting like a good girlfriend and her boyfriend was happy that she was behaving. When she wasn't pretending to be herself, she would seek shelter in abandoned classrooms and cry until she felt numb.

Lily's week was a bit better. She tried to immerse herself in books and homework. It also helped that her best friend constantly talked about her new boyfriend. Still, despite all her attempts to keep her mind busy, it always wandered back to the queen bitch; though she couldn't even really call her a bitch anymore. Narcissa barely looked in her direction, let alone look at her long enough to spit out any insults. It was weird. Not too long ago she would have given anything to have Narcissa ignore her. Now she would do anything to see that sneer again.

"Lily...Lily... Hello!" Alice yelled impatiently.

Lily shook her head.

'Shhhh! Alice control yourself."

"Control myself? You're the one who keeps dazing off. I've been trying to get your attention for five minutes. I swear Lily; I just don't know where your head is."

Lily sighed deeply. "I'm sorry Alice. I do not know where my head is either."

"Well how about you spend the rest of the day with Frank and I. We're going to walk around the grounds."

"No thank you. I'm going to go to the library."

"Again, you practically live there. Don't you want to hang out with us and see how absolutely wonderful and dreamy he is?" Alice's eyes practically glazed over as she smiled, thinking about Frank.

Lily smiled. "Alice I've known him for almost five years. I think I know how wonderful he is, plus its cold outside."

"It's not that cold."

"No thank you."

"Well fine, but I must say you are turning into an old prude." And with that Alice went up to the dormitories.

Lily sighed again. She gathered her things and went to the library. As soon as she entered she felt at home. It also helped that it happened to be quite empty. Students didn't like to study on the weekends. She walked through the rows of bookshelves until she saw a section that spiked her interest. Today that section was ancient ruins. She started reading titles. She reached for a book that seemed promising, '_Celtic Ruins and Their Uses', _but drew her hand back as she heard a distinct voice.

"Hello Severus."

She peeked around the corner and saw Severus sitting at a table in the back corner. Lucius had just taken a seat. Lily scowled; she really did not like Lucius. Now poor Severus had to sit there and be corrupted by him. She drew back and began to listen.

"Hello Lucius." Severus said quietly.

"No need to nervous. We're friends; you can be comfortable around me." Lucius looked at Severus and smiled hoping to instill some confidence in the smaller boy, but Severus knew all too well that you could not get comfortable in the presence of a person like Lucius. "I just wanted to have a bit of a chat with you."

"O..ok." Severus stammered. A chat? This did not sound like it was going to be a good chat.

"Well Severus, I've just been a bit concerned about you."

"Why would you be concerned?"

"I'm concerned about your choice in associates. I know that for the most part you are very quiet and tend to stay to yourself, but you have been seen in the company of some that are quite distasteful."

"But I-"

"Severus do not interrupt me!" Lucius growled and Severus ducked his head. "I am not going to tell you who to keep company with, but I do want you to think about your future. The world is changing and you need to think about the kind of man you want to be."

Such a simple statement and Severus felt his face drain of color. He had a feeling that he would hardly get to decide the kind of man he wanted to be.

Lily heard a chair move back and she quickly walked a couple of rows up and pretended to be deeply immersed in a book. She stiffened as she felt a cold presence behind her.

"Ms. Evans, fancy meeting you here." Lily turned around and froze as she saw the vicious smile on his face. She could tell that this would not be a pleasant encounter.

"It's no secret that I can be often found in the library."

"I guess the secret is that you can't help but listen to other people's conversations." Lily made a move to leave, but Lucius pulled her back. "Red hair is very noticeable, especially when one is peeking around bookshelves. I suggest you learn some manners."

"And if I don't?"

Lucius laughed, "My dear girl" he said very sweetly as he put his hand on either side of her head, "Accidents happen. I'm sure you would not like to find yourself on the wrong side of one."

Lily heard her heart beat in her ears and as Lucius walked away she opened her mouth before she could stop. "Should I expect an accident like Cassandra's or will you actually act like a real man and hex me to my face?" She immediately regretted her words as she saw Lucius pull out his wand. He silenced her before she could move. He knocked the wand she had taken out of her pocket and punched her in the stomach. The books she was holding scattered as she doubled over. Lucius kicked the books away and grabbed her wrists, slamming her into the bookshelf. She screamed but no sound came out.

"You stupid mudblood bitch, I thought you would at least be smart enough to know when to keep your mouth closed." She attempted to break from his grasp, but he was too strong. She had never felt this weak or helpless before. She turned her head as tears began streaming down her face. Lily started to shake as she felt his head near hers.

"You know," he whispered "I love to see girls cry."

She grew horrified and tried to distance herself. She felt surprised as she felt soft hand begin to pry Lucius' hands from her wrists.

"Come Lucius, you cannot do this here. What if someone sees?"Lily looked up to see Narcissa lead a still furious Lucius away. Narcissa looked back to see Lily fall to the floor still crying.

Lily wiped her tears and picked herself up. What had she gotten herself into? She felt as though she should tell someone, but would they believe her? It was her word against his and though she was a prefect, he was still head boy. She gathered her thoughts as she left the library.

Behind one of the shelves Severus tried unsuccessfully to stop shaking. He knew Lucius was no saint, but he never thought he'd have to witness it. Poor Lily. He felt like the biggest coward, there was the girl that he was in love with and he just watched her get assaulted.

As they left the library Narcissa remained silent. She knew Lucius and did not want to cause him to lash out. She closed her eyes momentarily. Thinking of that redhead made her want to cry. She felt like a coward. How could she stand by and watch her boyfriend attack the nosy girl who held her heart. Narcissa blinked as she realized that they were in a deserted corridor. She didn't expect the blow that hit the side of her face and knocked her to the floor. Lucius stood over her menacingly and lowered his head.

"Do not tell me what I can and cannot do! How dare you embarrass me in front of that piece of filth?"

"What if someone had seen you?" Narcissa said as her voice wavered. Lucius smacked her again.

"Shut up." He hissed. "When I want to hear you speak, I'll tell you to speak." He kicked her before walking away. He knew she was right, but he was in charge. She needed to remember that at all times. Narcissa slowly got up and held the wall to keep steady. She tried to hold back the tears that started cascading down her face but couldn't.

Lily paced back and forth in front of the headmaster's office. She was debating whether or not she should speak with the headmaster, when she failed to notice the professor with a twinkle in his eye walk up to her.

"Hello Ms. Evans. Is everything all right?"

Lily jumped and attempted to say 'Yes, of course' but nothing came out.

"Cat got your tongue? Or shall we say magic? Finite Incantatem."

"Thank you sir."

"Should I be worried?"

"No, sir." Dumbledore knew better. Lily looked shaken up and she had been crying, but he decided not to push the matter. "Well my dear, since we both do not seem to be doing anything important, how about you join me for some tea?"

"Uh…sure. Yes, thank you."

His office was very cozy. She immediately felt better as she sat in an oversized cushy armchair. Dumbledore hummed cheerfully while he prepared their tea. He sat down and made himself comfortable.

"How was your winter break?" Dumbledore asked politely, sipping his tea.

Lily was a bit confused. This was not the topic she'd expected him to bring up, but she'd play along.

"It was great. I got a lot of reading done and got to spend a lovely Christmas with my family."

"That's wonderful. I heard you receive quite an interesting gift."

Lily smiled momentarily, knowing the exact gift he was talking about. "Yes, James thought it would be nice to send me a teddy bear that continuously grew until it filled my bedroom." She remembered the incident well. Her parents were amazed, but her sister thought it was 'freaky'.

Dumbledore chucked. "He's always been one for unique surprises. He seems to fancy you quite a bit."

Lily smiled politely "Well yes he does, but James is so… just not right for me."

Dumbledore smiled also "Well I can see how that could be when he has such fierce competition."

Lily froze and her eyes widened. He couldn't mean Narcissa. How would he know? "No, it's just that he's so immature. I don't have time for that. I have so much schoolwork." She said lamely.

"Of course."

"Yes, I um I should go. Thank you for the tea sir."

She left quickly. _Damn, how does he always know?_


End file.
